First…lemme start out by saying that this episode was AMAZEBALLS. Literally, the best episode of the season (and it’s only ep 5!). If the show continues to get better (like it’s prone to do) I’m going to be a complete and utter mess by the end of the season.
It always shocks me how much information this show covers in such a short amount of time. I recently went back and watched Season 1, and was astounded by just how much is established as canon early on in the season. This show’s pacing is redic.
Secondly, all of the performances in this episode were pretty damn great…and again, soooooooo much stuff got covered. I really loved this episode, like…a lot.
Klaus~Final-fucking-ly. He finally lived up to his reputation in this episode. Since he showed up at the end of S2, and started getting all this “OMG! Klaus is sooo creepy!”/”Wow! Klaus is sooo EVUL!”/”Klaus is the bananas! LOOK AT HOW BANANAS HE IS!” I was mostly left going, “Uh. No.” I wasn’t impressed by him at all. Love Joseph Morgan--follow him on twitter and he’s great--but Klaus? Yeah. Whatever. I wasn’t impressed by his entrance or by anything he really did in S2. Hell, at the end of S2, I was like “If this is TVD’s new Big Bad…we’re going to have a problem.” He seemed whiney…and he really didn’t do much. I mean, people talked about how he did stuff (and he did turn Jenna while all of our collective backs were turned) but he never did anything onscreen that really impressed me. Even seeing him “torture” Ray in whatever episode and then turn all of those other werewolves didn’t really do anything. What a bore, I thought. He’s the suckiest Big Bad that ever did suck.
And then he fucking snapped Tyler’s NECK!
Like, right there onscreen! FUCKING TYLER! OMG.
He was straight up badass in this episode. I really didn’t know what his crazy ass was going to do, but I was sure of two things…I wasn’t going to like it, and neither would Team!Supernatural. Holy shit…he was amazing. Kudos, TVD, for lulling me into a false sense of security, and then turning my opinion on its head.
I hate you.
…and love you. *muah*
Non-Compelled!Stefan~…is kind of an idiot. Look, I get he was pissed and scared for Elena (the fact that Klaus had been repeatedly snapping his neck for a half a day probably didn’t help his mood much either) but jumping Rebekah and being all “Where is Elena?!” not exactly his brightest moment. And he’s had a lot of not-bright moments. She’s older than you, moron. She’s gonna kick your scrawny ass. I mean, Katherine kicked you and your brother’s ass all over the Masquerade Ball…and Rebekah’s a fucking AMAZON compared to her. Then, after she sticks a crowbar in him for his impudence, he goes to Klaus…and basically, lies. Badly. Like…REALLY badly. There is no way that after his whole 4 ep charade that Klaus is going to believe that Stefan is going to suddenly obey him and that Elena means nothing to him. I mean, what did Stefan think Klaus would ask him to do to prove his loyalty…bring him a glass of milk? Bake some cookies? …the hell? Seriously, this what his dumbest moment ever.
Until he tried to stake himself with a broom handle…and missed his heart. His own heart…in the center of his chest. He’s being all emo and over-dramatic…and he misses his own heart. Gimme a break, Stefan. You love Elena, I get that, but apparently not enough to kill yourself to keep from draining her blood. As the other Nerd said…I guess he’s not willing to catch a grenade for her.
…it’s this kind of shit that does my little Delena-Lovin’ heart good. Ha.
The Hybrid s/l~ is still about Klaus being lonely. The guy that stabbed his whole family with white oak-ash daggers and has them locked in a bunch of caskets. Lame. I don’t feel sorry for him at all. Puppy dog sad eyes or no. Maybe if he wasn’t such a bastard to his family, he’d have more friends. Just puttin’ that out there.
Bonnie/Matt/Ghost!Vicki~ HURRAH FOR VICKI! I’m glad she’s back…unfortunately, for her to come back she had to bring her lame assed brother along for the ride. Matt is seriously the most boring character in the history of ever. I don’t care about his boring human problems…so I’m guessing that’s why he tried to kill himself in the guise of “It’s so I can see my much cooler but more dead sister and she can help us find out what the Original Witch said!” Lemme punch a bunch of massive holes in his reasoning.
Firstly, the only reason that Jeremy can see ghosts is b/c Bonnie brought him back from the dead against the dead witches wishes (try saying that three times fast…) and there were going to be consequences. It had nothing to do with dying and coming back, Boring Mc.BoringFace.
Secondly, Bonnie may have big hair…but she’s got a very small body. What if she wasn’t able to drag your heavy ass out of the water? Then what, stupid? You’d be dead. For real and for always…and I would be ecstatic. Of course you wouldn’t let me be ecstatic…which is why I hate you.
Thirdly, what if Bonnie sucked at CPR?...or…forgot? Did you even think of that? Of course not, b/c you’re a moron. A human moron playing like you should be on Team!Supernatural, when really, you should just stick to Team!Useless or Team!Waste’of’Space.
Basically…I hate you Matt…please die forever.
Also…Bonnie? You suck at looking stuff up. I get that Jeremy might have been able to help…but running around in circles with the most useless character on this show was…epically useless. Yeah, she’s cut off from the witches…but couldn’t she have like, done a locating spell to find Jeremy instead of relying on texting him repeatedly? Or…I dunno, tried like a freezing time spell to slow the clock? Or maybe, an apparating spell and gotten all of them the hell out of there? I know they exist…Harry Potter told me so. Hell…what about her cousin(?) Lucy? Didn’t she give her her phone number in The Masquerade ep? Call her and see if she has any ideas. There was any number of things she could have done instead of running around the school like a chicken with its head cut off.
These two morons were quite the pair. It’s no wonder the Original Witch had Vicki lie to them…can’t trust the two morons in the bunch to do anything right.
I’m a little insulted that now Matt gets to try to be on Team!Supernatural. What a poser. I will never accept him on Team!Supernatural.
Never.
Poser.
Mystic Falls High School~…has got the suckiest security ever--unless, besides being full of supernatural beings, the school has a shit ton of delinquents who broke a window in order to get in the school. Also…why was Matt weight-lifting alone in a dark gym? Does Mystic Falls High School not pay for lights after hours? How’d he get in there? Why was he lifting in the goddamn dark? Without someone to spot him? He’s a boring, powerless human…what if one of the weights had fallen on him and he got stuck there? What was the purpose of all the cups in the gymnasium? Why did all of those students leave when a stranger came in there, dragging a frightened looking Elena, and not ask…”Who the fuck are you?”
These are all valid questions that I don’t think I’m going to get an answer to.
Caroline/Tyler/Rebekah~ It was sweet of Caroline to jump in front of Tyler to protect him, and these two continue to be a super cute second banana pairing on TVD. I’m not exactly sure why Rebekah is so pissy with everyone (are all Originals bitches? Or is it just b/c she spent 90 years with a dagger in her chest b/c she chose a boy over her brother and that boy basically moved on?) but if she’s not careful…it’s going to start to grate. I like her tho, altho, if I were her, I’d be a little insulted that my brother, whom I’ve reeked havoc with, wants to build a hybrid army b/c he doesn’t want to be alone. What is she, chopped liver? Like I’ve stated repeatedly…he’s got his entire family in a bunch of caskets that he carts around…he’s the most not alone person ever.
Compelled!Stefan~ I gotta get this off my chest really quick. I’m a little disappointed that the show decided to go with “Stefan is compelled to flip the switch off” route, since it takes away a lot of his responsibility. I get that he has to remain the hero to do heroic things, but I was really looking forward to him going balls to the walls because he wants to. I get that the compulsion doesn’t make him want to do evil things, it just makes him okay with them…but still. It’s a teeny nitpick that kind of makes all the difference in my enjoyment of the show…and it’s not at all what Juli, Kevin, and Paul led me to believe. These three are consistently being shown to be a bunch of liars.
I forgive them, of course, b/c…well, its TVD. If I can forgive Damon snapping Jeremy’s neck…I can forgive a few lies.
I’m interested in seeing how Compelled!Stefan is any different from Quippy!Stefan that I was so unsatisfied with from before. It’ll be interesting to watch him not care about Delena…but Delena care about him. Ha. This is shit fanfics are made of!
Damon/Katherine…Jeremy~ MUAHAHAHAHA! I loved that Damon finally…FINALLY got the upper hand with Katherine. Two lines, specifically…
“I thought I’d try it, but truth is, you just don’t do it for me anymore.”
“I wouldn’t have done it for you.”
Ha. Eat it, Stelena fans.
Damon’ll catch a grenade for her, suckers! Ha!
I loved them on their little roadtrip, and that Damon was completely in control of all of his faculties where Katherine was concerned. He was a little pissed off about being told to “take a beat” from Mystic Falls, but he wasn’t going to let that influence him having a little fun. Even if it meant that he had to travel with Katherine.
…and Jeremy in the trunk! Hahahahaha! High-larious!
I loved that even tho Damon bashed his head into a picnic table to force Anna to give up valuable information, and even tho he was a little pissed about it…he didn’t really hold a grudge. Okay, I get Damon’s all evil for hurting poor ring-wearing, always-getting-killed Jeremy…but Jeremy understands that Damon will do anything to protect his sister. And if bashing his head a little gets a stupid ghost to give up information that might save his sisters life…I don’t think Jeremy’s gonna have too huge a problem with it. Yeah…it hurt…but it’ll heal.
“Thanks for the concern, dick.” Brilliant delivery of that line, Steve R. McQueen.
And also…Katherine…I love her more and more each day. The speculative gleam in her eye upon seeing Mikael. Lord…I don’t even want to know what she’s thinking.
…wait…yes I do. It’s probably something evil and delicious and havoc-inducing. I’m excited. I love when Katherine’s got something up her sleeve.
And usually…it’s a lot of somethings.
Elena~ Okay, I love my girl…really I do. And I get that she was convinced that Stefan could fight compulsion if she just loved him enough and he wanted it enough…but couldn’t she have tried to have this conversation over the phone while she got the fuck out of there? Yes, yes…Klaus said that he’d kill everyone if she tried to leave…and then he left…and still tried to kill everyone. See how him saying one thing really didn’t change what he was going to do? Take note, Elena…Klaus is a liar and a killer. Doing what he says is just going to prolong the death of you and everyone else that you love. When Stefan, grimacing in mortal pain b/c he can’t fight the compulsion tells you to run…fucking run.
Question that Elena probably never considered but should have…if she hadn’t forced him to use up all of his energy fighting to keep from biting her in the gymnasium, and just run away like he asked her to in the beginning (b/c if she really thought Tweedle Bonnie and Tweedle Matt were going to come up with anything even remotely helpful, she’s an idiot) would he have been so susceptible to Klaus’s compulsion later on in the cafeteria?
Think on that, friends.
You gotta know when to hold’em…and know when to fold’em.
Secondly…before getting into the best part of the episode with the Delena awesomeness…a mini rant on said Delena awesomeness.
“Where were you, Damon?”
Seriously, Elena? Seriously?! He was told by everyone and their mother to “take a beat” from Mystic Falls and from her. Just last episode (sooo, maybe a few days in Mystic Falls time) she’d gotten all up in his grille about “Stop acting like a mean ol’vampire!” and “you can’t do this anymore, not around me!” and Alaric was all “Take a beat, Damon, b/c you’re getting too close to Elena!” and “Friends don’t kill friends, even when I’m considering poisoning you with vervain!” and Caroline was all “You can’t change Damon, he’s horrid and mean and he eats people like my asshole of a father who tortured me with sunlight!”…and then suddenly, the shit hits the fan, and everyone is all…”Damon?! Where’s Damon! WE NEED DAMON!”
Well, fuck all of you. He’s taking a goddamn “beat”.
(/rant)
Elena’s “friends”~ Notice I put the word “friends” in quotation marks. Let’s just break this down for a minute. Everyone knows that Klaus is there to presumably torture and kill Elena..and them secondly…but mostly, he’s there to torture and kill Elena.
He snaps Tyler’s neck and sends Bonnie and Idiot!Human off to find a spell that doesn’t exist or talk to the Original Witch. Caroline is left with an in-transition Tyler and Bonnie and Idiot are swimming in the pool, while Stefan and Elena are hashing out the “Use the Force, Stefan!”-shit in the gym.
The next thing Bonnie and Idiot know, Klaus is all super smug about something the Original Witch said.
Presumably…since they are all in the same school area, they hear Elena’s blood-curdling scream.
Then Klaus shows up to Caroline and Tyler and feeds him some blood, Tyler transitions without incident, and Klaus and Rebekah smugly walk away to wherever.
Next scene you see with all of Elena’s “friends”? Bonnie and Idiot bonding over his suicide attempt, and Bonnie telling him “Human is fun!” (which is a total lie, btw) and Caroline and Tyler are skipping through the hallways talking about how awesome everything is going to be.
And Elena is where, exactly?
EXACTLY. THEY DON’T FUCKING KNOW. And worse?
THEY APPARENTLY DON’T FUCKING CARE. Not once, during this whole last thing does one of them go “Wait. Where’s Elena?! The last time we heard from her she was being tortured and fed upon by vampires! And also, was that her screaming horribly? I wonder if she’s okay?”
Nope. Nothing. Elena’s “friends” fucking suck.
Damon/Elena…DELENA!!!~ Were amazing! I loved Damon’s completely willingness to go up against Klaus and die…and then using the leverage of Mikael to get Klaus to let him rescue Elena.
That’s right…he got to rescue Elena.
Sure, it was more rescuing her from a compelled nurse…but still…I’ll take what I can get from Delena. You know why? Because it’s fun.
And who doesn’t like fun?
Anyway…he got to carry her out of the hospital…and back to his house. Heh.
Being a Delena fan is AWESOME.
Anyways…my favorite scene was their small little conversation about the fact that NonCompelled!Stefan has become Compelled!Stefan…and how that kind of sucks.
For them…not for me, since maybe now he’ll be more interesting. I’ve always liked Stefan when he’s being a bit more grey than his ever present white.
When Elena teared up and asked Damon where he was…and Damon got that “I’m such a heel, I’ll never leave you again”-look, I swooned.
And then when he said he’d never leave her again…well…let’s just say, I’m pretty sure I did the Running Man in my pajamas for a good 5 minutes.
…b/c that’s how cool I am ;)
Ric, Caroline and Bonnie can go fuck themselves. I’m not really sure what would have happened if Damon had never left Mystic Falls…but everyone can obviously agree that it wouldn’t have been epically awful. Just, you know…regularly awful.
He held her hand…they looked meaningfully at each other, Damon gave a reassuring smile, Elena looked relieved…and Pacey and Joey nodded at each other.
…they’ve been there before. They know the signs.
*snicker*
Being a Delena fan is AWESOME.
Nerd .5
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